The worst ways to quit a job

Well you've probably all heard the infamous story of how JetBlue Airlines flight attendant Steven Slater quit his job by activating the emergency evacuation chute, sliding down it and making a break for freedom with a stolen beer in his hand.

And of course let's not forget Elyse Porterfield from LA, who wrote her resignation on a series of whiteboards and emailed the photos to her office (although this was later revealed to be a hoax).

So we on the careers advice team were wondering: has this sparked a trend for 'creative quitting'?. And how do you go about it if you don't have a plane to jump out of? Never fear! Here's our (tongue in cheek) look at quitting with style.

1. Be brave

Ignore all those people who advise you to approach it carefully. At an exciting time like this you don’t need them niggling away about resigning with grace, and ensuring you keep on good terms with your soon-to-be ex-colleagues. It’s not like you’re going to be calling on these losers for references in the future is it? And of course once you step out that door the chances of you ever having to work with any of them again is zero.

2. Be strong

You might find yourself having second thoughts about quitting. After all, these are people who you’ve seen every day possibly for several years. During that time you’ve got to know them. Apart from anything else they’ve given you work and an income for all that time. And it wasn’t so bad working there was it? You had some good times.

Don’t start thinking like this. Think too carefully about it and you might miss this chance to quit. A new job is always better than an old one. Stay strong.

3. Don’t give notice

Sure, it’s in your contract, but who worries about boring bits of paper like that? Tell them you’ll stay till the end of the day and for your leaving drinks, but after that you’re just a memory. No one likes people hanging around.

4. Build up to it

There’s nothing management likes less than an employee who, as soon as they’ve decided to move on, tells them immediately in a face-to-face meeting. They prefer it if you drop a few hints first, maybe take a day or two off pretending to be sick, and then tell some of your colleagues. If they hear it on the rumour mill first it gives them more chance to get used to the idea.

5. Be honest

You’ve spent quite long enough biting your tongue and putting up with the stupid way management runs things. This is your chance to tell them what you really think. So, don’t waste it. Tell them exactly what they do wrong and don’t mince your words. They’ll thank you for your honesty.

6. Don’t waste time on a handover

Remember when you joined the company there was that loser who spent a whole fortnight trying to tell you how to do your job? You didn’t listen to him, and the mug who takes over from you isn’t going to want to hear your opinions either. So don’t waste your time trying. In any case you’ll be too busy telling everyone about the great new job you’ve got lined up.

7. Cut loose on your leaving do

No doubt the gang will want to give you a proper send-off. (Ignore the jibes about ‘wanting to be sure you’ve actually gone’. They’re only joking. They’ll miss you really.) So, go out in style. Take full advantage of any free drinks on offer. Be the loudest person there and don’t let anyone steal your limelight.

If there’s someone you’ve never got on with make sure that, towards the end of the evening, you tell them exactly what you think of them. Or if there’s someone you’ve always had your eye on but haven’t done anything because they’re married or something boring like that, then once you’re properly drunk make a pass at them. You never know, you might get lucky. And if nothing else it’ll make sure they’re still talking about you in years to come.

- The 7 signs it's time to change jobs
- How to make a real fresh start in a new job
- Why you're scared to look for a new job